Tool:
I have a lot of mixed feelings about the DNA tests offered by Ancestry.com and 23&Me. They strike me, in part, a kind of voluntary participation in the worst sort of surveillance state technology. I don’t think I ever would have done it I hadn’t undertaken this project, but my days of doing anything even a little bit criminal are long behind me (or perhaps never happened, whose to say?) and so the risk seems minimal. Still, I’m not exactly recommending that other people send off their genetic information for date warehousing. I’m more saying perhaps only do this if you have a really, really good reason to?
The Story:
I’m working right now on the essay that will ask the question of whether or not I’m Jewish, and of course the answer varies depending on which authority is consulted. A Reform or Reconstructionist rabbi? Absolutely. An Orthodox rabbi? No. A Conservative rabbi? Depends on which one you ask. Israel if I want to make Aliyah? Yes. Israel if I want to marry a Jew. Nope. Nazis? Definitely, but who cares what Nazis think?
Almost all of my identities are contestable, though few have so many documented and contradictory boundaries on inclusion/exclusion as this one. And it’s kind of exciting, being able to ask the question in more than the abstract!
One of those documented boundaries, now, is DNA evidence of specific heritage. I imagine that these tests are really doing a number on a lot of people’s understanding of their identities (including revealing tricky things about parentage and family, which is one of the reasons I’m not wholly in favor of the tests). My DNA doesn’t offer a lot of surprises, except that I’d expected a lot more Irish and no Scottish at all. It confirms what my research suggests: that my branch of the Einstein family started marrying gentiles and wasn’t actively Jewish from pretty much the moment they emigrated. That my mother has one Jewish parent and one non-Jewish parent. That I am, genitcally, only kind of Jewish.
Jewish genealogy is fraught, and I’m just coming to understand how much so. I’d love to know your thoughts on how much you think the story of our DNA is, or should be, the story of who we are. Have you taken the test? What are your thoughts?
DNA
I am fascinated by this question and have been for most of my life. I haven't taken the Ancestry test but I asked my Jewish dad to take it after we were contacted by a probable cousin who I was drawn to. I had a surprisingly strong emotional reaction to seeing his results, that nice full yellow circle: 100% Ashkenazi Jew. Throughout my life I have been strongly put off by any notion of ethnic or racial purity, of any kind of purity, really, and yet I felt deeply proud of that result. For one thing, it was a big fuck you to Nazis who tried to obliterate the Jews including my relatives who I have been learning more about and feeling more connected to. But also, that DNA result proves I'm at least a whole half of something, in some way, despite having been raised with virtually no traditions or overt cultural connections and being Jewish through my father's side.
The man that i know and love as my dad, is not my biological contributor. I never knew that person, not his name nor what he looked like. Mom and I "married" Dad when I was two and he adopted me. (I'd had my mother's maiden name before the adoption)
So for most of my life I only knew of my Irish/Swedish genes. But every time I started with a new doctor, i was reminded that I did NOT know about "who" the other half of me was. And after age 50, i was concerned about what sort of unknown family history illnesses were lurking and waiting to pounce.
So I did the 23& Me earlier this year. Fortunately, it hasn't uncovered any medical disasters waiting to happen 😊 What I DID find, was a sister, nine years younger than me living in Pittsburgh. And a brother, one year younger than me and half Puerto Rican living in Atlanta. They were not complete surprises given that I knew absolutely nothing from the start.
I am in touch with my sister often even though we haven't yet met in person. My brother is hesitant. His experience trying to reconnect with his birth mother didn't go well. I let him know that I am always here, always his sister, unconditionally. My sister has been able to give me more medical history and pictures of my biological other. He passed in 2019, and I'm ok with not knowing him personally because my fatherly needs have always been completely filled by my Dad ❤️
I think my sister got the short end of the stick because her mother dated that man for 30 years. So he was in her life to a degree, but made it clear that he wasn't into kids and didn't want them.
I was in the right frame of mind to have undertaken this. I think a lot of people should receive some counseling prior to taking the jump, because they truly aren't prepared for what they may find. I've also seen some really beautiful stories come out of this. And those stories are not to be discounted. I applaud you for the research you are doing. But no matter what you find, you are still the one and only Sarah Einstein. The same person you have always been. And you should not let this information change you to the point of being someone else 🙏🏽❤️😘